Posts Tagged ‘ Sexy Grammar ’

Role-Swapping: Subjects, Objects, and a Sexy Trick for Sentence Revision

What do you think of this sentence?

Kiki handed the handcuffs to Al.

When your action is hot, but the sentence is not, try looking at your nouns and their syntax, the roles they play in the sentence.

Kiki is the subject, which drives the action of the sentence.

Handcuffs is the direct object, which receives the action of the verb handed.

Al is the indirect object, which receives the direct object handcuffs.

We’ve got some awfully sexy nouns to work with here, so let’s experiment with role-swapping. That is, change the syntax. What happens when we put Al in the driver’s seat as the subject? What is Al doing?

Al accepted the handcuffs from Kiki.

That’s different at least, but I’m still not feeling it. What if the handcuffs become the subject? What are the handcuffs doing?

The handcuffs fell from Kiki‘s hands into Al‘s.

See how the hot action of the sentence just got a little hotter? By swapping the nouns until you find the sexiest possible syntax, you can build sexy sentences every time.

The Sexy Grammarian teaches writers to create tight, juicy, scantily clad sentences and combines sexually explicit examples with grammar instruction, but she never does it alone. Writing this post, she got extra help from the twitterverse, specifically @EditorMark  @JulieFrayn @GrammarROCKS, and @mededitor. Thanks, tweeps!

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When Nelly Caught Ginny: Phrases, Clauses, and Complete Sentences

Which of these sentences sounds complete to you?

A. Through the drawer of vibrators.
B. Ginny loved it.
C. Playing with other people’s toys.
D. Nelly didn’t mind.

Examples B & D are complete sentences. Examples A and C are fragment sentences. Do you know how to tell the difference?

A complete sentence needs two basic parts of speech: a noun (the subject) and a verb.

That’s why on its own, example A is just a fragment sentence. The drawer and the vibrators give you some nouns to work with, but you’ve got no verb–just a phrase. A phrase does not have both subject and verb. On it’s own, a phrase is just a fragment sentence. Below, it is a phrase in a complete sentence.

Ginny pawed through the drawer of vibrators.

As part of the complete sentence below, example C is a phrase too.

Ginny loved playing with other people’s toys.

Unlike phrases, clauses do have both a subject and a verb.

E. When Nelly caught Ginny.

F. Ginny looked so hot.

But just because a clause has both a subject and a verb doesn’t mean it can stand on its own as a complete sentence. Which of the clauses above do you think is a fragment sentence, and which is a complete sentence?

Example E doesn’t quite make sense on its own. We’re waiting to hear what happened when Nelly caught Ginny. The thought is incomplete, a sentence fragment. But as part of the complete sentence below, we call it a dependent clause.

When Nelly caught Ginny, she didn’t mind.

Example F stands on its own. It’s got a subject, Ginny, and a verb, looked, and the thought’s completed. It’s an independent clause, and it can be a complete sentence on its own.

Still, it’s okay to combine independent clauses with other clauses and phrases to make more interesting and complicated complete sentences.

Ginny looked so hot jerking off.

Ginny looked so hot with Nelly’s vibrator.

Ginny looked so hot that Nelly didn’t mind her playing with other people’s toys.

At Sexy Grammar, we teach writers to create tight, juicy, scantily clad sentences and stories that climax. We incite sexy, bold, free writers. And we combine sexually explicit examples with grammar instruction. You can be a sexy writer, and we can teach you how. We believe that sexy writing is clear, concise, and packed with the delicious, descriptive words that make us all love the art of writing.

Check out more Sexy Grammar lessons. Get a Private Session with the Sexy Grammarian.

Three Kinds of Wuzzy Verb Problems

When we overuse the verb to be, we call the writing wuzzy, as in, This manuscript is boring because it’s full of wuzzies. Wuzzy writing doesn’t break any grammar rules, but looking closely at the grammar of a wuzzy sentence can help make it a sexy sentence.

Wuzzies with Adjectives:

Your thighs are soft, and my heart is hot.

When a to be verb precedes an adjective, consider tacking that adjective to its noun in a tighter, more visual sentence. Maybe like this:

Your soft thigh brushes mine, and my heart beats hot.

In these cases, eradicating the wuzzy can save you an entire sentence because you can delete the sentence and add the adjective to that subject in an adjacent sentence.

“Just believe me” or telling wuzzies:

Ava was the babe who walked into the room and set it on fire.

When a to be verb makes a claim without offering any visual example, the reader’s left unconvinced or worse, bored. This is what writing teachers mean about when they say “show—don’t tell.” So fix it by showing.

Ava’s sexy strut and bold energy lit the room on fire.

Wuzzies that create overwriting:

What I hear are your rapid breaths and the air filling your chest, in and out.

When a to be verb is the secondary verb in a sentence, you can usually just cut it, like this:

Air filled his lungs, in and out. I heard nothing else.

Exercise: Use your word processing software’s find or search feature, check the “highlight all” box, and then scan through your document to see how many of each of these verbs you are using: was, are, am, were, is, it’s, would be.

Study the examples above and try to identify with each example you find in your own writing what kind of wuzzy you’ve got. This should make the fixing easier.

Of course, you needn’t eradicate every single wuzzy, but having them highlighted should help you to see how often they appear in your draft.  This visual map gives you the opportunity to make a conscious decision about just how often you want to use the to be verb construction.  Look for places where the highlighting shows wuzzies too concentrated for your tastes, and cut down the numbers in those sections.

What is Sexy Grammar?

It’s the fun way we present writing tools and grammar guidelines. But it’s also a philosophy—that writing and art satisfy a human urge to create, not unlike sex. Sexy Grammar is about letting your inner writer be sexy—aroused, engaged, and unapologetic. When you do that, your writing gets sexy, and that attracts readers. You can get Private Sexy Grammar Lessons here.

Sexy Birthday Homonyms: eight & ate

Pardon me, for this blog post contains sexually explicit examples or content. If you are under the age of 18 or just uncomfortable with sexually explicit material, you may want to check out one of these sites about grammar and writing instead.

I’ve celebrated my 8 years in business this September with daily homonyms, and for the last dance, I offer:

The verb ate is the past tense of to eat, as in: Continue reading

Sexy Birthday Homonyms: reek & wreak

Pardon me, for this blog post contains sexually explicit examples or content. If you are under the age of 18 or just uncomfortable with sexually explicit material, you may want to check out one of these sites about grammar and writing instead.

The Sexy Grammarian’s sexy homonyms birthday party winds down this week with my sexiest example sentences yet:

The verb reek is to smell strongly, as in: Continue reading

Sexy Birthday Homonyms: steel & steal

Pardon me, for this blog post contains sexually explicit examples or content. If you are under the age of 18 or just uncomfortable with sexually explicit material, you may want to check out one of these sites about grammar and writing instead.

The Sexy Grammarian’s sexy homonyms birthday party winds down this week with my sexiest example sentences yet:

Steel, a noun, is a form of iron, as in: Continue reading

Sexy Birthday Homonyms: pain & pane

Pardon me, for this blog post contains sexually explicit examples or content. If you are under the age of 18 or just uncomfortable with sexually explicit material, you may want to check out one of these sites about grammar and writing instead.

The Sexy Grammarian’s sexy homonyms birthday party winds down this week with my sexiest example sentences yet. I dedicate this pair to Eminem because every time I hear him rapping along with Rihanna’s sweet singing in this song, I have to say to him, “No, Em, that’s not why they call it window pane.”

The noun pain expresses physical suffering, as in: Continue reading